The Spirit of EQ Podcast – Welcome!
Eric: Hi there. My name is Eric Pennington with the Spirit of EQ, and I have with me today Jeff East, who is with the Spirit of EQ.
Jeff: Hello. How are you?
Jeff: Doing great. Jeff I know there’s certainly got to be questions on the mind of those out there listening, “What is the Spirit of EQ?”
Speaker2: Spirit of EQ is a local company that is a preferred partner of a larger group called Six Seconds. And Spirit of EQ works with individuals, works with groups, regular business people, some nonprofits things like that. Even with youth to help them learn more about emotional intelligence, learn more about what emotions are for and how they can use their emotions to just be a better person, boss, parent, kid. So that’s our goal.
Eric: I hear emotional intelligence a lot. You know it seems to be the new corporate buzzword. So if I’m kind of agreeing to that whole idea, if I’m just the average person on the street, how can I benefit from it.
Jeff: What emotional intelligence does is allow you to take the emotions that you’re feeling and use them for the purpose that they are there for. It’s just like when you’re a kid and you touch a hot stove and you feel that pain and you learn, hopefully, not to touch the hot stove again. That pain is just giving you information. This is something that I need to be aware of and emotions are the same way. The emotion of fear is neutral which most all emotions are, but that emotion of fear is giving you information there’s something there that I need to be aware of. If a bear jumps out in front of you feel fear and then you decide what you’re going to do with that. Am I going to fight it? I’m going to run away. Am I going to freeze, play dead, or I’m going to flock and find other people? Emotions are there for a purpose. And what emotional intelligence is, it allows you to take those emotions and use them to respond to a situation rather than react. And we’ll talk about that more on some of the future podcasts.
Eric: As I was thinking about it, The Spirit of EQ. Tell me a little bit about the history of the organization, the company, and what it’s done and where it came from that kind of thing.
Speaker2: Ok. The Spirit of EQ was founded by Jim Vaive who I worked with in another career in another company. The company that we were at, because of his interest in this kind of thing, we used a lot of different assessments, different kinds of profiles, but then he found this one. He became certified in it and we used at that company and then he split off and did Spirit of EQ to concentrate on that. Jim and I and Jim’s wife Lynette were all lucky enough to be able to retire from previous careers, the first half of this year, and focus on this.
Eric: That’s a great story. I mean you got to see this in action. Yeah. And that former life and you guys want to take it and move it out to the world as a whole. And it’s all kinds of organizations regardless of size, individual?
Jeff: It can be anywhere from one individual. We have some tools that we could work with a large organization and be able to have a project with up to three, four or five thousand people involved. And some of the vital signs that the stuff that’s designed more for organizations.
Eric: Well I think you probably would admit or agree. There’s so many things out there that people are bombarded with messages. How to do this. How to do that. The five secret ways. The five important steps. Why would you say this podcast would be important for somebody to listen to.
Jeff: The importance would be to be able to deal with all those emotions that come from all these things we’re being bombarded with. To actually be able to take something that you might learn from one of these other things. “How do I really feel about that?” “Is this something that is important that I want to try?” “Am I neutral?” “Maybe it’s OK.” or “No this doesn’t resonate.” And be able to use your emotions to help guide you with some of that kind of stuff so that you do what’s important to you.
Eric: So I’m a big fan of coaching and I’m one of the things I love about coaching is that it’s kind of this idea that somebody is coming alongside me on my journey as I’m trying to figure this stuff out. Is that kind of maybe where you’re going with this or where are you on where we want the podcast to go.
Jeff: Yeah. The stuff that we do needs to have somebody alongside, in one way or the other, to help interpret. We’re not going to direct. We’re not going to tell someone this is what you have to do. What our goal is to find out what you think you need to do and then give some tools, encouragement, sometimes a little bit of you know, kick in the pants, to make you accountable for whatever it is that you decided to do. You know I need that done a lot.
Eric: My wife does for me!
Jeff: So to be able to move ahead with the things that you feel are important. One of the competencies, which we’ll talk about later too, is something called “Noble Goal.” And when we work with someone with their Noble Goal that is going to become the driving force in their life. It becomes what makes them who they are. Most people have it. Most people have not taken the time to identify it.
Eric: What I’m hearing even though you haven’t said the word is “learning.” That this process of where I’m trying to figure out what I need to do, how do I proceed? So what is the learning philosophy?
Jeff: Well there’s five things and I’m not going to be able to tell this whole story of some of the ideas but this comes from Six Seconds. This is the company that we work with. And they have five things. One of them is Wisdom Lives Within. As a coach when I’m working with someone I’m going to be asking them questions and help them discover their own answers. So the wisdom really lives within the person that we’re working with where the person is listening to the podcast. The second philosophy we have is No Way Is The Way. There is not a certain thing that is going to work for everyone. I may be working with you, Eric. And then I go work with someone else and it’s going to be completely different because everybody is unique. So part of our role is to help people find out their unique way of how they need to correct things.
Eric: So Jeff if I can interrupt you on that point. Does that mean that if I come from a different walk of life, a different religion, a different ethnic background, it’s not a cookie cutter process it’s unique to who I am.
Jeff: No the assessment tool we use is a self-assessment. So the person is accessing their selves. And so we take that “this is what you said about yourself.” So we’re going to work with that. And so everybody’s assessment is going to come up different. That’s one of the big things that we concentrate on is this person is individual.
Eric: Wow that’s that’s really really powerful.
Jeff: The next one is the Process Is The Content. We really emphasize developing a level of trust between the person that we’re coaching and ourselves. So that process of developing that trust most times is going to be more important than the actual “This is what you’re going to do.” or “This is what I’m observing.” It’s to develop that relationship with the person on a deeper level, emotional level, something like that. So that way that allows us to get where the person wants to go. You know we’re not psychologists, psychiatrists so we’re not going to do that type of counseling or coaching.
Eric: So no clinical.
Jeff: No clinical stuff. That’s not what we’re about. We’re just that’s just not who we are. So if we get into that kind of a situation we will say you need to probably go see someone else this is beyond what we’re doing. But we want to get to know that person. To develop a relationship as we go through the process. This one is called One Two Three Pasta and this one I do know the backstory on that.
Eric: I’m curious now. One Two Three Pasta.
Jeff: Josh Freedman who is the President CEO of Six Seconds the larger company we work with, his son was learning how to cook and he just went through the steps and he just said: “It’s one two three pasta.” So it’s where we just try to develop a simple process for the person. We don’t want to make things overly complicated. You know when you’re ready for cooking pasta you get your water. You measure it out. You put the pasta in and you heat it up. And at the right time, it’s done.
Eric: I’ve got to ask you on that point because it’s such a complicated world. Have you found that your past clients or people that you’ve worked with, have they found a bit of relief in the fact that you’re striving for that simplicity?
Jeff: When we work with someone there might be one or two areas out of the eight competencies that we measure people on. And when they see that “If I just work on this one it’s going to have an effect on everything else I don’t have to work on everything.” “You know I may just want to start with this” and then by working with that competency, they’ll see that it’s going to affect the other competencies as they go through the process. So that is a relief. You know we don’t come in with a big long big workbook and say you have to go through it. You know we might give them just a couple of exercises or things like that to do. And then the last one is Fish Don’t Talk About Water. And what that is, if you think about it, to a fish water is everywhere. It’s all around them. So why am I going to talk about that? So when you’re dealing with somebody they may not talk about their environment because it’s so familiar to them. It’s what they’re used to every day. So by getting them to maybe dig into that, you might be able to help them with some insights to be able to move ahead. Because it’s just that we don’t talk about our day to day stuff, our normal everyday thing, as we go through.
Eric: That’s interesting because you get into your habits and your modes what you do day in and day out and before you know it a lot of time goes by and so yeah I get that. That’s a great analogy.
Jeff: And education is extremely important to the model that we have. Six Seconds actually, the company that we work with that provides the assessment tools, actually started from the education field. And so education, teaching is very important. If someone would come to one of our seminars, workshops they would see some powerpoint, they would see some talking, they would be broken up into small groups and maybe do some things that way. They would get up and we would do some physical exercises. Then we come back and talk about them. So it’s all those things that go into education, to teaching. And we use that same model whether it’s with adult, businesses or kids.
Eric: OK so you do that cross-generational as well that business and nonprofit?
Jeff: We’re working this summer with a group of kids with a summer program and now we’re probably going to be working with them with an after-school program to just give them some basics of emotional intelligence.
Eric: I’m going to come back really quickly to the idea of when we ask “Why is this important,” why would this podcast be important to someone who maybe is familiar with the emotional intelligence or someone who maybe doesn’t know a thing about it. Again recognize that we’re in this crowded, noisy world with all kinds of messages and demands. Could you maybe touch on living in the world we’re living in today, the society that we’re living in, and how the podcast could potentially give them maybe even just one little gold nugget to take away?
Jeff: Part of what we do is the reflection. When we get into more detail, one of the stages is reflecting, looking, and seeing what’s happening. We don’t do that very well anymore. It’s not part of what we’re supposed to do because we’re supposed to be busy because that’s what we’re being told. So if you take a Saturday afternoon to go take a hike in the woods you’re “wasting your time.” We need to do that. I don’t think we’re designed to be as busy as we are. So just the idea of being able to reflect on things, even if it’s just for a minute after you had an interaction with someone is going to help. Because in our busy world you deal with one person at 10:00 and then you’re doing the next person at 10:05 and you never have a chance to really think “How did that thing at 10:00 go?” “Did it really accomplish what I wanted?” “Did I leave and did the other person leave that interaction better?”.
Eric: Because isn’t that interesting? You go through your day and you’re sitting in this appointment or in this meeting or this interaction with this person, it completes, and then your mind jumps to “I need to check email,” “I need to find out…” “I need to go…” And you just blow right past what just happened which could have been great.
Jeff: It could have been great. You might have made a mistake. OK. I need call that person I need to get back in touch with that person because it didn’t go the way I wanted and that’s what we teach. There’s really no right or wrong when you’re talking about emotional intelligence. It’s what you do with it.
Eric: So ultimately the listeners will gain all of the above, plus probably more.
For more information, contact Jeff at firstname.lastname@example.org. Or go to their website at Spirit of EQ.